School is finally out for the summer and I’m happy, happy, happy! Knitting awaits me and chilling in my new sun glasses. I will try to make the most out of this summer and enjoy every single moment one way or another. Soon a new chapter starts but first I deserve a well earned break.
I’m carefully optimistic, but let’s not look too deep into it, because I actually got a little knitting inspiration yesterday. I have a friend whom I’ve known of for many, many years, but who I’ve just started to get to know and she unexpectedly helped me the other day. A few words really but they were the right ones. It made me so happy and I felt was knitters feel when we are happy and grateful, we want to knit. I have bought the yarn (allready in balls so that I don’t have to wind), I have found the pattern. I haven’t searched for the needles yet, that might be an obstacle, and if this is as far as I go with this project, I don’t mind, it’s still good progress. However, should this mean that my mojo is back, I am forever grateful to my friend and I will knit her many, many things. From now on, any step taken will be huge progress and I have high hopes for it. I just haven’t decided when it’s time to actually cast on. That, though, is a question for another day.
I looked through my blog posts from a year ago and apparently I thought I was going to knit a bunch of sweaters till this summer. Moahahahaha! No. Just. No. I also mentioned that I didn’t own a single pair of socks (well, a pair without holes in them, that is) and whereas I haven’t knit any sweaters this year I have indeed knit socks. Since August last year I’ve knit several pairs of socks and I now own no less than five pairs (and one pair of slippers). Socks has happened even when nothing else has.
When I made these a coworker asked me if they were for a child, she just couldn’t imagine they could ever fit a grown-up, let alone me. I put one on to show but she was still skeptical. And sure, they might be a little bit of a struggle to put on but they fit wonderfully once they’re on. Like a glove. Not to mention that they are super cute! I’ve worn my socks quite a lot this spring while sitting on the couch writing my BA thesis. It has been a cold spring but I’ve been wrapped in my guinea-pig socks and the cold hasn’t bothered me at all (btw, that’s probably what Elsa meant, she was wrapped in wool and wasn’t bothered by the cold one bit whereas her sister clearly isn’t dressed for snowy weather). Hopefully I don’t have to wear socks that much this summer though, but I sure am well prepared for fall.
People keep asking me how I’ve managed this spring and I don’t know what to answer. It was hard, I will try to remember that (you always forget how hard something was unless you really think it through). It wasn’t easy and there are friends I haven’t talked to, let alone seen in months and months. I decided back in January that I would cut out everything that isn’t work, studies and exercise. And that I did. What I didn’t expect was to cut out knitting. I figured knitting always happens somehow. And you know what, it doesn’t. Sure, I have 14 projects in different stages of finished but my heart isn’t in any of them. They were made, they took forever, I either blocked them or left them and then forgot about them.
In the beginning it felt weird not to knit. It felt like something was missing and that I would go crazy. Then, slowly but steady, I stopped caring. First I realized I couldn’t knit shawls anymore so I moved on to socks. That worked for quite a while but then I stopped knitting them as well. I could think that I was going to have a nice long evening of knitting, or at least an hour of knitting before bed and then no knitting happened. I picked up the needles and knit two rounds and then I put it down again. I caught myself doing it and picked up the needles again and knit another two rounds and then put it down again. Then I repeated this till it was time to go to bed. And the weird thing it that it’s not bothering me at all. And that bothers me. I’ve lost my mojo and I worry it won’t come back. I don’t have any knitting ideas, there is nothing I want to do and even worse, I don’t even care about the finished projects I already have. I haven’t worn a shawl in forever, I think I lost a wristwarmer the other week but I couldn’t care less. The only action my shawl drawer has seen this spring was when Agnieszka wanted to borrow one of them. I knit during coffee breaks but that’s pretty much it. I don’t log in to ravelry anymore, I don’t search for projects, I rarely buy yarn and I have absolutely no inspiration what so ever. I dread it when my current sock-in-progress is finished because then I don’t know what to do, what to knit. I know what I should knit (baby sweaters!) but I can’t even think of making myself do it. I don’t have the energy to wind yarn, find a pattern or rumble through the stash, let alone dig out some needles. It’s not happening. I might cast on another sock but I’m not sure I would actually finish them, that’s how deep into this I am.
I think that I might be tired and that’s the problem. I need to rest my head and once I’ve had a few quiet days (weeks?) on the couch, hopefully the knitting mojo will come back. Let’s not be worried, yet, let’s cut me some slacks in the knitting department and let’s see what time brings.
I’ve been a bad blogger this month. I’m sorry about that. But all my time has been divided between work and studies and some work out to make the other two work… out I guess. I toyed with the idea to join Me Made May again but no, not this year. Or rather, I have some me made things, just not knitted ones. Today I handed in my Bachelor thesis, my French paper. It’s been a process and it’s been tough from time to time but it has also been very fun at the same time. It’s totally me made, and a huge work effort too, 30 pages in French, that’s not bad. I’m very proud and very happy about it, I think it turned out very well.
Other than that I’ve worked on my muscles and my cardio and they are me made as well. I’ve done good. But I have not knit. Or, I have not not knit but I haven’t knit much. I haven’t even been wearing much knitting. My biggest “accomplishment” in the knitting department is to lose one of my blue wrist warmers. As you hear, there is room for improvement but that’s a question for June. For now I’m going to enjoy my me made stuff and be happy about them. That’s all that matters.
As I’ve mentioned before, spring evenings make me wistful. There is something about the smell and… I don’t know, hope? There is something so hopeful about spring evenings. This year has been incredibly cold so I haven’t yet found the true feeling, where you can stand in a street corner, talking way past what is reasonable, in your coat that was just enough in the sun earlier in the day but is now way to cold and you finally get home and you need hide under all your blankets to be able to sleep and it takes over a week before you are truly warm again. But it was worth every second of it because you have someone you can spend way too many hours talking to on a street corner when it’s really past your bed time.
Or maybe it’s just me…
The purple finally came and it’s perfect. The sock is a spring evening sock, showing every aspect of the spring evenings, the cold, the smell, the hope, the dusk, the humidity, the light from a street lamp and your new spring shoes. It’s all embedded in these socks. That’s not bad for a random sock, just like that. But that’s the thing about the spring evening, you don’t even notice it until you are in the middle of it and it hits you before you have a sliver of a chance to defend yourself. But I’m not so sure you want to.
As a side note, Håkan is from Göteborg where they say Valborg so we have to forgive him (especially since the song is wonderful), I would never call it that since, as we all know, the best April 30 is celebrated in Uppsala, where it’s called sista april, last of April. It’s a shibboleth, what you call April 30 will tell me if you’re originally from Uppsala or not.
The weather is giving us whiplash injuries, it changes to often. It’s sunny, and snowy, and rainy and hailing, all in one day, multiple times a day. It’s dramatic and powerful and also a bit annoying. At the same time, weather impresses me. I like weather. I find it humbling that we can fly to the moon and do so many things but the weather can still kick our asses, without even breaking a sweat. We can do so much but rain still wets our heads and snow forces us to wear boots. A big thunder storm is a spectacular performance and just look at that sky. So amazing and impressive!
Yes, I made it home before the hail started again.
So, I bought this yarn partly because Agnieszka liked it and because it was purple. It sure had a lot of other colors as well but the purple was what I saw. Gradient yarn is cool to work with and I cast on. I knew there were some colors before the purple but I figured I would get there quickly enough. Well, look at that sock! It’s almost completed and I haven’t even reached the purple yet. It’s coming soon so I’m guessing I will have one sock with a purple toe and another with a purple cuff and that will be it. The rest will be just gray and green and petrol. Perfect for Agnieszka but still, come on, I wanted purple! A huge part of the leg of the second socks better be purple or I’m going to be seriously bummed.
I have a huge deadline tomorrow and have barely stuck my nose out the door this weekend. However, I have started a new pair of socks. It was all I could think of to make that didn’t require too much mental activity. The mitts I made was fun but went by a little too quickly so here we go again, another pair of socks. I have a good feeling about this project.