Harmless piece of string

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Imagine you and I are sitting among a group of friends. We’re having tea and cookies and have a generally good time. I take out my knitting, like I always do when I have a moment to spare. You lean forward to take a closer look and I show you what I’m doing. You admire the color, telling me that you have a sweater in that exact color, it’s beautiful. I agree, it’s lovely. I continue knitting and then I add a bead. You lean forward again to see what I’m doing and I show you and now you notice there are quite a few beads in my knitting. You tell me that beads look like a cool thing and then you say it. You open your mouth and tell me that you would have chosen beads in another color, that would

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have been better.

This is where I’m not longer sure what to answer. Why are you telling me this, that you think other beads would have been better? Are you expecting me stop what I’m doing, give you a big hug and say “thank you, thank you, I’ve been waiting to hear what this knitting really looks like, I can’t believe that no one told me before, now I will immeadiately frog it so I can change the beads and start anew”. I think this is pretty unlikely, don’t you? Or, is all that talk about you having clothes that would look good with this knitting and then telling me it doesn’t look good a sneaky con to make me give it to you? Well, what makes you think I will finish it now that you’ve told me it doesn’t look good?

The thing is, if I had bought a new and expensive sweater and showed if off, would you tell me the color is pretty but you think it would have looked better with a v-neck and 3/4 sleeves? It’s not like I will frog my knitting now and it’s not like it was intended for you anyway, so why do you feel the need to tell me that the beads should have been in another color? What I’m really wondering is what gives you the liberty to criticise my knitting? It’s done nothing wrong, it’s just a harmless piece of string put together in various ways of knit and purl stitches. Do you know how much time I had to spend comforting my knitting? That’s not my idea of an ideal knitting evening.

Yeah, I don’t understand the need to tell me what’s wrong, in another person’s opinion, with my knitting without me asking or us discussing color choices and what works and what doesn’t. What does anyone get from it? I probably won’t frog my knitting, no one else will care and the person saying it, well, I don’t know, feel good about themselves? I simply don’t get it. But then again, that’s just me.